You know how we give, give, give, always questioning our mothering against the 'shoulds' on how we spend time with, talk to, and relate to our kids?
Well yesterday, with reckless abandon, I gave my son one spoon of ice cream and proclaimed the rest as my own. There was no 'fair split' - I ate pretty much all of it, and he watched!
Why am I telling you this?! Because as mothers we need to surrender to the pockets of the day that we can make deeply nourishing to ourselves, without guilt or shame over what that may take away from our children.
We need to set boundaries. Sometimes those will be for our children's safety. Sometimes they will be for our own sanity and self-respect.
And when we deeply own and stand in our authenticity in these boundaries and rituals for ourselves, we teach our children that it's okay for them to do it too. And that's the kicker - because in doing so, we are not raising children who are 'people-pleasers' disconnected from their own voice, we are raising children to listen to their inner wisdom rather than the opinions and rules of others.
That's what I want for my children. Even when at times it will piss me off! They are here to self-actualise and bring their unique gifts into the world (as are we!) and living by my values and guidance all of the time is negating the wisdom in their own.
So there you go, life lessons from a tub of ice cream:
So mama, enjoy your ice cream, or your chocolate, and when the guilt creeps in, ask yourself 'What are the benefits to them?' When we become emotionally polarised, we are missing the full picture.
Bridget Wood is Co-Founder of Nourishing The Mother and a lover of life and connecting people to themselves through wisdom, introspection and quality questions. Bridget is also the Director and Events Manager of Suburban Sandcastles. With an insatiable appetite for knowledge and a desire to understand the bigger picture of human behaviour and how the world works, Bridget is on an inspired path to learn more deeply who we are beyond the limitations that we, and our society and culture, place upon us.